Bitter Sweet

June, Wednesday 2nd

Pilates- I look round and I think people have progressed a lot more than I have, I am finding a lot of the moves hard. Some I have not done before. The two months off did let the others get a long way in front. I had a word with Joanne she said I am doing fine, obviously some of the others have bean coming longer so they should be better. They have not got the health problems I have. I think I am a bit down.

3rd

I have bean in the garden a lot of the day. The weather is very hot again.
Pete is round for another run - same place, same time. I ran a bit slower this time as it is so hot. Both knees hurt and my RSD foot is spasming it hurts when I put my foot to the floor. After a while my foot stopped hurting when it realised it was not going to get any attention. We ran for thirty one minutes. I did not stop once, so I was so pleased. I think slower is better but if I can keep the running up the speed will come back. Pete was pleased I did so well.

4th

Physio-

All is well with Wietse I told him that my legs have bean burning. I also let him know about extra pain I am getting more pain if some thing hurts on the left side, my right side RSD will join in this is something that has not happened much up till now. Oh the joys of RSD.

5th

The boys and Lindsay are year the day is very warm so they are in the garden.
As I was putting up the small slide I pushed down and felt something go in my ribs at the front so,so painful. I think I might have cracked them or at least bruised them.
Sandy is having a good day following them a round. She seems a lot better today almost too good.

6th

Today Sandy is just the opposite really bad she is having trouble walking and has a dazed look on her face. Late Sunday night I think she had a mini stroke, or fit. Her legs are very stiff. she does not seem to know where she is very unsteady on her feet. Her appetite is good though. I am giving her lots of extra cuddles.

7th

Sandy is not too bad . She has bean for a little walk. She is panting a lot and still has got the dazed look about her. I don't think her sight is good as she keeps walking into things. Later on in the day she got worse, that night she had another small fit and fell into her water bowl. I have decided to spend the night with her as I don't think she knows where she is. All night she is panting and shaking sometimes crying. I sit and hold her and try to comfort her but she is not good. I have not slept all night but somehow don't feel tired. I think this is the end for us both.


8th

Sandy is worse Paul and I are taking her to the vets. She had a big fit about 8am. Her little neck is stiff and her eyes are staring at me I don't think she knows where she is, also I think she is blind. Her breathing is so bad. We both know that this will be her last trip to the vets.
At the vets she was given her last treatment she passed peacefully into sleep she had gone.
I have lost the best little friend I ever had, what am I going to do now. We have laid her in her basket covered up she just looks like she is asleep at peace after all the pain.

9th

Sandy is going to be buried in the garden with her favorite toys. Wayne came from Halifax to say goodbye we all stood at the side and cried. She will be missed by a lot of people as she was well known.


11th

Physio - Wietse knew something was wrong even before I told him he gave me a hug and a Wietse special talk. I told him about my ribs as they have bean very painful a lot worse than the weekend. He exclaimed me and he thinks they are broken. He told me about every hour or so to hug my self and deep breathe so the ribs mend correctly, this is painful but I will do it. I have bean taking extra extra pain relief, also using BIO FREEZE. I feel really bad and in a lot of pain. My short spell of running has come to an end for now so has ridding my bike. I told Wietse that every time I have a good spell things always come tumbling down.
I am missing my little baby Sandy, every where reminds me of her and people are asking where she is.

14th

Early hours of the morning my stomach swelled up and I felt very sick I thought it was the stress of the last few days. Bed at 3am but not for long as I started wrenching as to be sick not good with broken ribs. This went on all night till I was exhausted, I was not sick but all the same kept wrenching. I am in pain at the back of my ribs as well as the front now. I could hardly move.

16th

Doctors today for update and tablets. He says I most likely have broken my ribs as Wietse thought and also wrenched them from 14th. He did not give me any thing as I already have enough pain relief all ready. When I breathe they crack and move they hurt a lot.

18th

Physio Wietse could not believe what extra I had done to my ribs. He told me to be careful as they can get more damaged. Today I feel very weak and tired, Wietse thinks its something going round as he has not felt right either. While football was on I went for a lay down and actually slept for a while.

Love Gill.